ℰmmi (seulpeo) wrote in galaxyabandoned,
ℰmmi
seulpeo
galaxyabandoned

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{shinee; jong-centric} 3 times kim jonghyun was at a loss for words

Title: 3 times kim jonghyun was at a loss for words
Fandom: shinee
Pairing: jonghyun/zhang liyin, jonghyun/shin sekyung, jonghyun/key
Word count: 3 x 350
Rating: PG
Summary: as the title states, three times kim jonghyun was at a loss for words.
A/N: first shinee fic on the comm, so now i have left are teen top and mblaq before i feel guilty!!! tbh, i dont ship any of these pairings, except maybe the last one.


i.


zhang liyin noona is much prettier than she is in pictures. even more surprisingly, she looks incredibly young for her age, pale and slender and sweet but still mature. for recordings, she ties her hair up.

when they meet for the first time, jonghyun almost falls over himself in a rush to bow to this successful sunbae at the entertainment, especially anticipating this opportunity to work with her; she is one of the many established idols he has passed in the hallways, one of the few soloists working alongside the successful groups like super junior sunbaes and snsd sunbaes, and she is well known in multiple countries. he has been a trainee for several years now, and has spent countless hours practicing both dancing and singing and smiling at his mirror, but this is the first time (but certainly not the last) that his voice will be professionally recorded and put on a proper album. hes so nervous and excited that his hands cant stop trembling.

the song is called 'wrongly given love.' its just the kind of song jonghyun loves--powerful, emotional, with beautiful lyrics and dynamics. it took weeks to get his mandarin pronunciation good enough for recording, but zhang liyin noona still has to correct him sometimes. chinese is tiring for jonghyun, with too many new consonants for his mouth to shape, too many new vowels together in one syllable, but noona is patient and kind, taking him through every character with unfailing forgiveness.

while they wait to start recording, she teaches him words. jiejie is what she would be called instead of noona--he calls her jiejie about three times then forgets; luckily, she has long gotten used to korea, and answers to noona or "jang ri in" with an ease that puts an inexplicable bitter taste in jonghyuns mouth. gou means 'dog,' and chang ge is 'to sing.' she laughs when he asks her how to say 'beautiful': piao liang.


when she sings, however, all of the chinese and all of the korean jonghyun knows is useless.




ii.


management tells jonghyun that he is officially dating shin sekyung, and suddenly the world tips upside down.

its his shtick on variety, that he brings up shin sekyung and lee minjung on broadcasts, that he really likes women even though none of the members would introduce their sisters to him. and he does like sekyung. he does. she is beautiful and talented and charming, and she is his ideal type.

but, to be honest, this isnt the reality he wanted. he already planned (imagined) it all out, how he would have tried to win her heart had they not chosen the entertainment industry, had they picked being happy with normal lives instead. and then actually dating, the holding hands, kisses in hidden corners, dates in the park. he had dreams, but thats all they will ever be. dreams, now broken.

instead, he finds himself standing on a bridge beside her in the dim glow of a streetlight, the wind whipping around them so violently they had to change spots from the street of bright shop lights and quiet civilian houses to this shadowed river; he is shivering because his jacket is draped over her shoulders, but barely notices. he has never seen her so sullen before, eyebrows pulled together and mouth set in a frown. theyre listening to a cameraman give directions--walk down this way, look at but not into the camera, smile like youre enjoying yourself--and, by all means, this is just another photoshoot.

when they do start taking the publicity photos, she does not lean into him the way he imagined. her smile is brittle and professional, even a little bit pitying, and when he puts his arm around her, careful not to hold her waist too hard, she flinches away from him. between fake laughter and directions from the photographer, they do not talk. the thought of his fans' responses to this chokes the words in his throat and makes him feel like hes doing something very, very wrong.


when he later finds out about taecyeon and jessica, he doesnt even have the words to be angry.




iii.


its one of those slow days, with less enough schedules that the boys return to their dorm for a few hours of sleep and winding down, maybe a bite to eat according to their diet regimes, before they get back into the car for a performance or an interview or a photoshoot or more practice.

as always, key has been pushing himself too hard without realizing it, juggling his idol career between sketches of outfits, paint on canvases, auditions for musicals; his bandmates gang up on him and banish him to the bedroom, onew and taemin promising to make him a delicious meal and minho, at keys order, watching over them to make sure the kitchen doesnt burn down. jonghyun is sent into the bedroom to keep key company (which is just an excuse because he needs the rest just as much).

jonghyun settles into his cold, foreign blankets and pulls out the notebook he likes to jot bits and pieces of lyrics in. the songwriter noonas that he showed his precious lines to gave him encouragement instead of apologies, praising the rawness, the emotion of his words, and even bringing up the possibility of a track written by kim jonghyun on the next album. meanwhile, key is curled up on his own bunk, breathing slowly.

'jjong?' key says into his pillow. it startles jonghyun, who assumed he was asleep.

'yeah?'

'i want to go to paris, too.'

its the trailing end of a past conversation, where key confessed his desire to go to new york and experience american city life. new york, jonghyun can understand, with the rushing pace and sense of purpose key thrives on. key has never been to new york but he belongs there. but paris--paris is not expected. paris is jonghyuns type of city, romantic and ethereal and surreal. a city where you go to fall in love, surrounded by a beautiful language and filled with the lights of the eiffel tower. paris is for the dreamers.


jonghyun imagines key bathed yellow in the brilliant lights and cant reply. key does not expect him to.



A/N: just a few disclaimers: i have no idea how close jong and liyin are, im not sure how real jongkyung ever was and whether it was because of taecsica (but this is just my personal opinion), and expect more fic off of that jongkey bit!
Tags: fandom: shinee, pairing: jonghyun/key, pairing: jonghyun/shin sekyung, pairing: jonghyun/zhang liyin
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